Endless Bedroom

To think of my bedroom, I listed out the key elements of how I perceived as my bedroom.
- the position I am lying on my bed
* the relative position of doors & windows
* the angle of morning sun
- the noise from the street
-the landscape from the windows
- my laptop and my digital world
* the lighting in the dark especially bedlight

The elements with * are closely related to my
claustrophobia and nictophobia. I realized that wherever I go to sleep or I decorate as my own room, the layout of the windows and the doors have to be the same as my childhood bedroom. There used to be a time I heard from my family that there was a thief hanging outside of my windows while I was sleeping, and the shadow on the curtains in the morning looks like someone hanging there and I didn’t dare opening the curtains.
Since then, I am not able to shut the curtains, I am not able to shut the door, and I will definitely buy a bedlight to guarantee my superveilance on both windows and the doors. So it came to me that however big the room is, I always have a shrinking room in my vision for my mentally feeling secure.